Snape's First Movie
by ProfessorSnapeScream
Summary: If only Severus had been a little more mature, it could've had another first too.


It was a February afternoon, and two thirteen year olds were in the kitchen making popcorn on the stove, and talking about the television program they were about to watch.

"So there's little tiny people that act out an _entire _play inside the tellymabob?" asked the boy in amazement. He had never watched TV before, and was excited to watch it for the first time.

"No Sev, it's just pictures _of _people flashing really fast so it looks like they're moving. " explained Lily. "And it's called a television, not a tellymabob." She rolled her eyes. Severus was her best friend, but sometimes he could be a bit of a dunce, especially when it came to Muggle objects. However, she probably sounded like a dunce too, asking all of those questions about the Wizarding world.

"I think all of the popcorn is done now, Lily." said Sev. They both filled up two bowls of the puffy kernels, and walked to the den. "By the way, what type of movie are we watching?"

"You'll love it!" answered Lily. "It's my favorite! But I'm not going to tell you; it's a surprise." Sev just shrugged. Lily liked action movies, she had told him, but he didn't know exactly what that meant. Did they move around a lot?

They sat down and turned on the TV. A logo flashed on the screen, then disappeared. This put Sev in a wonder-induced stupor. Another logo flashed, this one with lots of music and curly type. It read _"Oh, My Sweet Darling Baby Cakes"_. Severus shook himself out of this daydream. A romance? Lily _never _willingly did anything that had to do with gushy stuff like that. She would much rather jump off a double decker in the middle of London.

Right?

"This is the best movie ever! It is _so_ romantic!" squealed Lily. Sev never had seen her in this sort of boy-crazy fashion. When The Beatles came to Spinner's End, she just stayed at home and played with her dolls, while Petunia stood in line for hours to see Paul, the most normal looking one of the group.

"Uhh...Is there anything else on TV?" asked Severus. He was still only a boy, and like all boys his age, they got squeamy at stuff like that.

"No, it's a Valentine's day marathon on all of the good channels." He looked confused. "It's a Muggle holiday. Anyway, we're just going to have to watch this."

Severus let out a little groan, but Lily was too engrossed in the film to hear. It started off with a small, bony little woman with tons of rouge on who lost her memory, and a burly man with a perpetual cigar that claimed that he was her husband. _Highly predictable, _thought Severus, but said nothing. He could tell how much this movie meant to Lily. The movie continued with many tearful hospital scenes where the woman made slow progress at regaining her memory. Whenever he looked to the left, there was always a tear in Lily's eye.

The movie sort of got interesting when the woman got a shiny car from her "husband" on her birthday. She rode it on the highway near the sea, when all of the sudden, a storm hit, and the waves carried the car out to sea. Lily went from sniffling to full out bawling, and buried her head into Severus' shoulder. This put him into shock. _Great, what do I do know?, _ he asked himself. The only thing Sev thought of was to pat her back softly. _Severus Snape, Girl Charmer. Yeah right._

After an overdramatic scene involving the man swimming out to sea to save his beloved, there was this whole shindig about her getting her memory back, and remembering that he really was her husband. Here erupted joy, and..._what?_

The couple onscreen shared a passionate kiss, which would have made Severus squirm, had he not been in the presence of Lily. _Uh, oh... _Lily leaned toward him, and his heart beat ten times as fast. _Ahhhhh! I've never snogged a girl! What do I do? Ahhh!_ Out of instinct, he pointed his wand at the TV, and muttered the first spell that crossed his mind. The TV instantly caught on fire, much to the horror of Lily.

"Uhhh...sorry about that. Well, see you tomorrow!" he shouted as he ran out the door. He was way past her street before she even had a chance to yell at him, and he shut the door quickly as he got in his house. "H-he-hello mum," he said while catching his breath. "How are you?"

"Well, your father actually got off his lazy bum today, and made some money, so with the extra quid, he got us a brand-new telly!" she said. "Isn't that exciting? Now, to turn it on you press that button. Oh look!" she cried. "My favorite movie! Let's watch, Severus!" But he had a funny feeling. Just as he left the room, a logo appeared on the screen. "_Oh, My Darling Baby Cakes 2" _it read. Severus collapsed to the floor and lost conciousness.


End file.
